Elfira Yolanda S

The Name of this Book Is Secret by Pseudonymous Bosch

My rating: 3 of 5 stars

The narrator is a bit peculiar and that is exactly why I will definitely read all the books in Secret Series! He maintains two-way communication with the reader throughout the story and he is addicted to chocolate.

The series are a pentalogy since there are 5 senses. This first book is about smell.

I think the book is educating (especially for children) in a very entertaining way. There are a lot of notes of various common knowledge including one big point about synaesthesia, a neurogically-based condition which makes people experience sensory mixture. This book makes me wonder how life feels like when I adopt synaesthesia.

Can’t wait to run into the book store and grab the rest!

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I am not a tea lover. I am not a tea hater. My relationship with tea has always been consumer-product without any special feeling.

When I drink tea, that means I might be at home because it is a custom in my family to serve tea in the morning. I love the tradition, not the beverage.

I can mention 2 favourite brands of tea that would be my first choice at the convenience store if I ever need some coolness running down my throat (it’s Bali!). I think the third brand is nowhere to find nowadays.

But today I took one cup because something snapped at me. I unintentionally set my eyes to the property of a friend at the office and when he kindly offered the little package that I had never seen before, I immediately accepted it. Judging from the writing on it, it was a Chinese tea.

I ran into the office pantry and made it and drank it. All that time, there was nothing in my mind but the tea. I put all my attention to the tea. I did it to leave me unattached temporarily with things I didn’t want to face. Simple words, I did it so I could run away for a moment. I think. People do that, don’t they?

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To pay or not to pay that is the question
It refused to stay, as it all turned gray
Oh, William Shakespeare’s receding hair

Please excuse the pun
It’s hair today, gone tomorrow
So be thankful for what precious locks you have

To pay or not to pay that is the question
And by the way I just gotta say
Thank the Lord, I’m not going bald

And if I may quip
My curls and I are just like heaven
‘Cause rest assured, there’ll be no parting there

But should my head get bare
Like Friar Tuck or heart chased a swallow
It makes me smile ’cause I know just what I’d do

Yeah, if I had more wigs than I knew what to do with
I’d open a second hand store
And if you ever went bald, you’d recall it
‘Cause I’d cleverly call it, ‘Rugs From Me To You’

Oh, I love this song by Owl City! The lyric is hilarious. I don’t know what got him into writing such a lyric, but it makes me laugh! It’s a cheerful song, too.

I think it’s not only Adam Young, I too like to think of the what if, lots and lots of it. What if I don’t get.. What If I can’t.. What if I won’t ever.. But this song has taught me to lessen the fear and the worry. Look how he quickly develops from questioning the probability of going bald and then conforming himself that he will never lose his hair to the decision of what he’s gonna do if his head should get bare someday.

This song with its taking a problem easily, it soothes me. It makes me at ease. Sure, several things should be taken seriously. But I’m a “feeling person” and I feel something intensely. It helps me to let go of things and just laugh at sh*ts because you know, sh*t happens and laughing at it would make it no big deal.

And as Rick Warren said:

If you learn to laugh at yourself, you will never run out of funny material.

Why so serious? :D

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It was Saturday so you didn’t have to go to the office. No one else was at home. They were in Surabaya for the reason I can’t remember.

But our conversation when you picked me up after school, I remember that. I remember it so well.

Do you know what I buy today?

You asked me that question.

I learn that when people get excited, sometimes they slip out their mind and other can read it so clearly. It was exactly the case with you that day. I screamed my answer with the same if not higher level of excitement. I was so happy because I had never thought that you would buy that. I didn’t even think to make a request.

Later on that day, I played card with Pauline, Michelle, and Ben.

I miss you. I wish you knew.

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This is my second book I own for the same title. The first one, an Indonesian-translated edition, is in Bandung. I had never got a chance to finish it. I bought the English edition last year. This book is by Rick Warren. Asides from this book, I have read his tweets and his daily article and I adore the way he writes. His writings are quotable for me.

This one is special because it’s the first book that I read together with 2 others, Astri and LDK. We read and discussed a chapter for our weekly sharing time. It’s not always weekly, sometimes we had to cancel it and postpone it for weeks but overall it was a special experience and experiment.

The Small Group

I don’t exactly remember the detail but I guess it started a year ago around the time we had the Menjangan trip. We shared common desire to have a small group, to share, to grow, and to pray together. We even did rather awkwardly pray together at our stay in Singaraja.

The detail on how we came to pick this book has escaped my mind, too. But I think it’s a good choice to help us prepare what’s so called the quarter life crisis. :D

The Purpose Driven Life

Most people struggle with three basic issues in life.
The first is identity: “Who am I?”
The second is importance: “Do I matter?”
The third is impact: “What is my place in life?”

According to this book, the answers to all three questions are found in our five purposes.

The book is designed to be read in 40 days, a chapter a day. But I guess that’s too fast a pace in reading something that holds a lot. Every here and there I find something that reminds me or tells me in a gentle way. I feel like reading it again in even slower speed. Scriptures are quoted a lot. That’s a good sign and another reason I should revisit the pages.

As it is a self improvement/self growing book, I’m grateful to read it not on my own. My friends can hold me accountable for each lesson I need to apply and that helps. Looking at the past experience, self improvement book is a nice reading but not quite a strong push to change. At least for me, it is necessary to have friends watching over me.

To finish this book does not mean I can answer those 3 questions above firmly. What I have from reading the book is a good start to calm the uneasiness for the future and to really live.

Living on purpose is the only way to really live. Everything else is just existing.

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Thanks to the Ubud Writers & Readers Festival, now I know there is such a type of writing called flash fiction.

What’s fun about creating a flash fiction is that I don’t have to think big for the plot. Well, finding the idea is still the most difficult part but to have it for a much shorter writing does help, at least for me.

There are so many awesome entries that I’ve found. I’d like to recommend her 3.13 and his 3.13. They are a pair of equally lovely posts! I voted for several more but those two impressed me most.

Anyway, reading those fiction makes me realize what kind of writer I want to be. I’ve been thinking about that and now I can put some answer to that question.

Most (mm.. I don’t know, maybe 60%-ish) fictions that I admire fall into dark fiction. Well, not dark. I just haven’t found the right word. It contains certain portion of revenge, murders, suicide, betrayal, anger, unfaithfulness, and so on. I found myself voted fictions like that because honestly those were cool, those are cool. I still think so.

It’s not that I object to them. I don’t have any objections. It’s truly great because it’s real. Those things happened in real life. It’s just that for me, if I am about to give impression to my readers (still a long long way to go but someday, someday, amen! :), I want it to be heart-warming. I think that’s my goal.

Back to Ubud’s festival, I submitted 2 entries. I’m going to archive it here.

My flash fiction entries

I promised myself to finish reading a book today when I decided to buy Sherlock Holmes The Complete Novel and Stories Volume II. The lucky book is in Bahasa Indonesia, 3 Cinta 1 Pria (bluntly translated: 3 Loves 1 Man) by Arswendo Atmowiloto.

Why This Book?

Not why I chose to finish reading this book but why I bought it. The synopsis. It said that this one man had special relationship with 3 women, the grandmother, the mother, and the granddaughter. So. I bought this book. The author was quite famous in Indonesia. I had never read his books so I picked this one to satisfy my wondering about both the author and the story. How can he craft story like that?

Spoiler alert!

I thought I knew.
Apparently I don’t.

Feel like I’m not capable of loving.
So, how?

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Following quote is from C S Lewis’ Screwtape Letters. This is his 3rd letter (well, based on the letter appearance in the book) and I’d like to quote parts of it. Screwtape is a devil and his letters are his advice to Wormwood, his nephew on making human do bad things.

I am very pleased by what you tell me about this man’s relations with his mother. … Keep in close touch with our colleague Glubose who is in charge of the mother, and build up between you in that house a good settled habit of mutual annoyance; daily pinpricks. The following methods are useful:

1. Keep his mind on the inner life. He thinks his conversion is something inside him and his attention is therefore chiefly turned at present to the states of his own mind–or rather to that very expurgated version of them which is all you should allow him to see. Encourage this. …

2. It is, no doubt, impossible to prevent his praying for his mother, but we have means of rendering the prayers innocuous. Make sure that they are always very ‘spiritual’, that he is always concerned with the state of her soul and never with her rheumatism. …

3. When two humans have lived together for many years, it usually happens that each has tones of voice and expressions of face which are almost unendurably irritating to the other. Work on that. …

4. In civilized life domestic, hatred usually expresses itself by saying things which would appear quite harmless on paper (the words are not offensive) but in such a voice, or at such moment, that they are not far short of a blow in the face. To keep this game up, you and Glubose must see to it that each of these two fools has a sort of double standards.

…

I am stunned because it is true. I haven’t just done to my mother, to my other dearest ones, too. I think, to some of the closest ones I set my tolerance lower than to others. I expect more from them. I am more easily annoyed and I know exactly how to annoy them and yes, I will do it on purpose to get revenge (just like the point number 3 and 4 above). The regrets will also hurt me more.

I know it’s another exhibit that I will not be able to love without His help. I am writing this because I have done something wrong today and it makes me feel bad and desperate. Though I know that people are selfish and slow learners and faithful is one of His unexplainable character, it is still not easy dealing with guilt.

Confessing like this is actually helpful for me. Somehow it makes me feel better. And if any of you reading this and maybe you have experiences like this, well, you’re not alone. If you don’t, lucky you! If you are one of my dearest that I have hurt you in a way or two (well, or anybody for that matter!), I’m sorry. Please know that it’s difficult to love sincerely and I’m still working on this.

I think I will always be working on this. But it doesn’t matter, you know. Because the process is a chance to get to know Him better, to depend on Him more, just like the way He wants it or so I read in many books or so I’ve been told by people (hmm, do You really want that? for me to surrender all to You? ;)

Thank You for not giving up on me. :D

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I got an award from the exotic Rika Aldrin. It’s called You’re Going Places, Baby!
The rules: describe where you think you’ll be in 10 years and then pass it along to other bloggers.

Ten years from now, I think I’ll be living in one of metropolitan city in the world. I read in the wikipedia that the city has been a polyglot home of numerous international organisations, politicians, diplomats and civil servants. It has buildings with old architecture style as well as modern one. My favorite monument is there, the Atomium. The city is the capital city of Hercule Poirot’s origin. Well, I don’t know where I’ll be in 2020 but I do hope I will be in:

BRUSSELS

Anyway, at first I felt weird when they called this thing an award (by this thing, I mean that blog post tagging about certain topic). I thought award was supposed to be the prize to a winner, a reward, something like that. So I asked a question about this in stackexchange . Somebody mentioned the etymological origin of the word that in my opinion could apply to this case: something awarded (with award as a verb that means to decide after careful examination and observation).

OK, that’s You’re Going Places from me. Now I’d like to pass the award to Ochie and anyone who’s willing to share. Where do you think you will be in 2020?

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